Daily Foglifter: In 2009, Americans spent $45.4 BILLION on their pets.
When going out of town, pet owners sometimes have to board their animals. In a traditional kennel, this service is generally provided at a very reasonable rate, somewhere in the neighborhood of $20-$25 per night, which includes food, exercise, and maybe even a bath. This, however, is not good enough for some “pet parents.” They opt for a Pet Spa or Pet Hotel. Yes, it is as bad as it sounds. A Pet Hotel has several different options available for the pampered pet. The top-tier at the particular Pet Resort I looked into is the Concept Suite. The amenities (for a dog, mind you) include 48 square feet of space, TV, DVD player, satellite, and a toddler bed all for the low, low base price of $44.25 per night. This does not include food. If the dog stays over 7 days, it is given a free body scrub in the Pet Day Spa. If, however, you want to pay for the Spa Treatments, the Body Scrub and Blowout (a la Jersey Shore?) start at $40/hour. This is crazy enough, but this particular spa was in an average city, not like anything you’re likely to find in LA or Beverly Hills, where celebrity pet parents have WAY more money than sense. Even pet food is ridiculous. I saw a commercial the other day with a mom pouring dry dog food on her kids’ plates with the voice over saying, “You would never feed your family dry food from a box, why would you serve it to your pet?” Um, because it’s a freakin’ dog! My dog prefers toilet water to fresh. He also can’t resist the savoring aroma of a discarded poopy diaper. Many a time I’ve come home to find a diaper with the poopy parts completely eaten away. Needless to say, filet mignon is too sophisticated for such a palate as that. I could go on and talk about health insurance, hip replacement surgery, or chemotherapy for pets, but I honestly fear for my safety for even suggesting that these aren’t logical, sane measures to take . Believe me, I know some crazy people with very skewed views about the importance of animals. I actually know a woman who said that if she was driving down the road, and there was a dog and a person in the road and it was apparent that she would have to hit one of them, she would aim for the person. Think about that the next time you start to cross a busy street at the same time as a dog. Your life could be in serious jeopardy.